Hi there, I’m Zara, a full-time working mom living in the heart of suburban America with my wonderful, energetic son who just turned five. If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably asked yourself more than once, “Am I doing this right?” Motherhood doesn’t come with a manual, and when you add a full-time job, a household to manage, and the emotional rollercoaster of parenting, things can get a little… messy. Over the past few years, I’ve made my fair share of mistakes, but I’ve also grown and learned so much.
In this article, I want to share some of the most common parenting mistakes I’ve made (and seen other moms make), how I’ve worked through them, and practical tips that might help you too. You’re not alone, mama—we’re all learning as we go.
1. Neglecting Time Management (and Then Wondering Why I’m Always Frazzled)
For the longest time, I thought I could wing it. I’d keep mental notes of school events, work meetings, grocery lists, and playdates. Spoiler alert: it did not work. I’d forget permission slips, show up late to meetings, and constantly feel like I was scrambling.
What I Learned: I had to embrace structured time management. That meant using a shared digital calendar with my husband, setting reminders on my phone, and finally buying that giant wall planner for the kitchen.
Tip: Dedicate 10 minutes every Sunday evening to plan the week ahead. I jot down my work calls, my son’s school events, meal plans, and even self-care blocks (yes, I schedule time to breathe). It’s been a total game changer.
2. Putting Myself Last—Always
There was a stretch of time when I couldn’t remember the last time I’d done something just for me. No bubble baths, no solo walks, not even five quiet minutes with my coffee. I told myself I was being a “good mom” by focusing on my family 100% of the time.
Reality Check: I was burned out, short-tempered, and disconnected—from myself and my family.
What I Learned: You can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself is not selfish—it’s essential.
Tip: Start with small self-care wins. I began by waking up 15 minutes earlier to sip coffee in peace. Then I added a monthly book club with my friends. Even getting my nails done once a month helped me feel more me. And when I started prioritizing myself just a little, I noticed I became a more patient, present mom.
3. Letting Mom Guilt Rule My Life
Oh, the guilt. It creeps in when I miss a bedtime because of a late meeting. It whispers in my ear when I say no to a third bedtime story because I’m exhausted. It screams when I drop my son off at daycare with a quick kiss and then rush to work.
What I Learned: Guilt doesn’t make me a better mom. Showing up, even imperfectly, does.
One night after a long workday, I got home just in time to tuck my son into bed. I apologized profusely for being late. He looked at me, yawned, and said, “It’s okay, Mommy. I’m glad you’re here now.” That moment hit me hard—kids don’t need perfection; they need presence.
Tip: When guilt creeps in, ask yourself: Is this feeling helping me or hurting me? Practice self-compassion. You’re doing the best you can—and that’s enough.
4. Trying to Do It All Without Asking for Help
I used to wear my independence like a badge of honor. I’d cook, clean, do bedtime, manage doctor appointments, and still take on extra projects at work. I didn’t want to “bother” anyone or admit that I couldn’t juggle it all.
What I Learned: Asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s wisdom. I finally had an honest conversation with my partner about sharing the load. We divided responsibilities more evenly, and I started delegating at work too.
Tip: Build your support village—whether it’s your partner, friends, family, or even a trusted babysitter. And most importantly, accept help when it’s offered (without guilt!).
5. Forgetting to Enjoy the Little Moments
In the chaos of schedules and to-do lists, I realized I was missing the magic: my son’s belly laughs, the way he says “spaghetti” wrong, his fascination with rocks and bugs.
What I Learned: Slowing down and savoring these fleeting moments matters more than a spotless kitchen or inbox zero.
Tip: Create small rituals of connection. For us, it’s five minutes of “snuggle chat” every night, where he tells me about his day. No screens, no multitasking—just us.
6. Letting Work Bleed into Family Time
There was a phase when I was physically home, but mentally still at work—answering emails during dinner or checking Slack during story time. I thought I was being efficient. But really, I was robbing myself and my son of real connection.
What I Learned: Boundaries are powerful.
Now, I have a strict “no work emails after 6:30 PM” rule. I close my laptop, turn off notifications, and show up for my family.
Tip: Try creating a “transition routine” at the end of your workday. I change into comfy clothes, light a candle, and take three deep breaths before switching into mom mode. It helps me be fully present.
7. Chasing Perfection Over Progress
I spent too long comparing myself to Pinterest moms, Instagram-perfect families, and those “10-step” parenting articles that made me feel like I was always failing.
What I Learned: There’s no one “right” way to parent. The best we can do is show up with love, intention, and a willingness to grow.
Now, I celebrate small wins. My son ate vegetables today? Win. We both got out the door without tears? Huge win. I yelled less and laughed more? That’s progress.
Tip: Give yourself grace. Instead of aiming for perfection, focus on connection.
Final Thoughts: You’re Doing Better Than You Think
Mama, if you’re reading this and nodding your head—or maybe tearing up a little—know that you are not alone. We’re all figuring it out one bedtime, one tantrum, one packed lunch at a time. There’s no such thing as a perfect mom, but there are millions of good enough moms doing their best every single day.
I’ve made a lot of mistakes, but I’ve also learned that love covers a multitude of them. My son won’t remember if the laundry was always folded or if dinner came from a drive-thru some nights. He’ll remember that I was there. That I loved him fiercely. That I showed up.
So here’s my final tip: Be kind to yourself. You’re doing a hard thing. You’re doing it with heart. And you’re doing it beautifully.
